Apocalypse Road AAR: Full Metal Jacket Derby at Black Widow Hollow (Part 2)

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This article is Part 2 in an Apocalypse Road After Action Report series from Stig Morten Breiland. To read Part 1, go here.


The tale of Ad79. Hero or zero?

Ad79 entered the Apocalypse Road scene early on when racers were recruited. He chose to enroll into the Gelato Division out of Ultima Thule, owned by a mysterious being going by the name of st.mo. A saint he was not, but Ad79 was treated well by the team. He started out as middle of the pack team member but as his skills with the mechine gun rose, so did st.mo’s regard of him. He soon funded a turret that gave Ad79 new possibilities on the track. The new turret took out opponents ahead, behind, and to the sides, but the tinkering with the car wasn’t over. Armor plates were removed in the dead of night and when Ad79 arrived at the starting line of the now infamous figure 8 track, still known as Essendarium, in the season finale all those years ago the spectators went into a frenzy.

Since that day, the speed and turreted machine gun have made Ad79 a living legend amongst the Gelato Division fans. The team always places him in the thick of the grid to allow him opponents, or targets as he refers to hem, all around him.

At Black Widow Hollow he started on the second line of the grid. He was the first to be hit, as he is a feared opponent, and he was shocked to learn that his trusty Machine Gun had been put Out of Position and he couldn’t fire first chance he got.

Now he  found himself at the front of the pack and 4 sectors away from the finish line and a point for his beloved Gelato Division.

But, his team weren’t the ones with the next activation, in fact his teammate Dasher Carsten had just finished. It would be a long time until Gelatos next go.

As every spectator that has ever lined the Apocalypse Road to witness the carnage knows. This isn’t just about bullets, missiles and cannons. It is also car parts flying, doors falling off and cars being hit by the perfect Ram. That dreaded move where the racers throw caution out the window and just aims the biggest projectile they have, their own car, right at the opponent.

Baguette Baker’s car number 17, identity of the driver still unknown, finds himself in the spot just behind Ad79. His choice is this. Live up to the motto of the team, go for speed, try to pass, and deliver points sorely needed. Or, ram him.

Ad79, making sure he stays in the draft of Deadbeat’s OWL, bides his time until his machine gun gets back to working order and focuses on getting past the finish line, but a jolt sends his head flying backwards into the headrest of his seat. He can feel the car starting to lose control and starting to spin. Using all his experience to keep the front of the car pointing forward he briefly regains some control, but that pesky Baker behind isn’t done just yet. A small change in direction initiated by the 17 car manifests itself in Ad79’s car and the end comes swift. The legend rolls over and over and comes to a stop when the car hits a barrier. The thundering silence is heard across the track. No Ad79 can be seen crawling from the wreck and the racers roar by.

The tale of Ad79 comes to a crushing end as the Baguette Bakers put the first point on the scoreboard.

The Ram move can be a powerful and destructive move if it hits, but it can also give the Ramming car a lot of damage. You never know and that is why you need to throw caution out the window and go for it.

The Gelato Division, in shock over losing their driver, quickly sends Tyrone the Monster into the Chute, believing he will bring the pain to the Bakers soon.

Owl of The Deadbeats misses his shot next as he might still be in shock from the events unfolding behind him, but manages to go past the Gelato driver in front and push a teammate and a Baker across the finish line to give the Deadbeats two points. In the process he also handed a point to the Bakers which means Deadbeats and Bakers got 2 points each and hold the lead.

The “Dangerous” Derek Ciamell of the Mountaineers takes revenge on Dasher and sprays him and those adjacent with a poorly aimed machine gun shot, but now every car is past the dirt and Jump sections. We might be seeing a lot of points soon as almost all cars are close to the finish line.

The Gelatos are up again, and with only 4 cars currently on the track, they  kick into high gear, making sure their cars can cross the finish line and deliver the points before ruthlessly being rammed off the road and into oblivion.

Car 3 (will you be the one sponsoring this 4 Mp beauty with a forward facing missile launcher with a Targeting computer?) uses a Diagonal Lead movement card to push and drag his teammates across the finish line and launch Gelato into the lead with 4 points. The 17 car of The Bakers also tags along to deliver the third point to that team.

Gelato plans to devastate the 17 car with the missile launcher, but since the card inclues a Move Event icon, that needs to be resolved before firing. “Into the Weeds” he goes and 17 lives on. So, Gelato Division is in the lead, one car down, one in the weeds, but can they keep it?

Moxie “MOXER” Murdock, having seen the carnage dealt by his teammate tries the Ram himself, but fails to hit and only ends up passing the car he tried to Ram.

After the Move event, MOX wisely chooses to swap places with X9X, as 115 behind has a forward mounted Missile launcher. 806 of the Blue team has a turrets Auto Cannon, but MOX hopes the Mountaineers will bring him along as they will likely try to do so with X9X on a future activation.

As Stina, in the 115 car, puts 5 damage on X9X before passing the whole blue/red line it proved to be a wise decision by MOX.  MOX, now the obvious center of attention for a few activations receives 2 damage from Thor, (806) before Thor races on with Line Movement and pushes a Deadbeat past the finish line for a point for them.

Gelato misses another shot at hurting 17 and with four out of five cars activated for the turn Gelato Division holds the lead with 4 points. Deadbeats and Bakers follow close behind on three, while the Mountaineers still have not scaled any mountains to put points on the table.

SPT, first car across the finishline, misses his shot aimed at the Deadbeats and takes of from the front all alone.

Teresa “the Dominator” White, car 121 of the Deadbeats, slams down a Ram card, moves around teammate Stina and Rams Dasher. While Teresa scored a point to tie for the lead she failed to take out Dasher and such it was not an entirely successful move.

Soonsin Lee pushes the entire Blue team across the line and also brings along a Baker and a Deadbeat to fly from way behind into a tied lead.

The Gelatos makes another unsuccessful attempt at avenging Ad79 with an attack on 17, and turn 1 of the “7.62MM Full Metal Jacket Derby” ends with only one car lost.

More carnage, explosions and destruction coming in Turn 2…


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